Tuesday, May 16, 2006

BIG BROTHER - The insanity of the mundane….


3 days left before Channel 4 and every tabloid newspaper in the western world becomes fixated with the latest set of housemates to be plucked from obscurity and descend upon the Big Brother house. Seven series ago..it started off as a niche reality show now seven horrible years later we have Big Brother's Little Brother and Big Brother's Big Mouth and this year latest addition Big Brother's Big Brain: a brand new live psychology show.

My first question while slightly naive is nonetheless relevant, how oh how can you possibly fill 3 shows talking about a show which films a house full of nobodies in real time!! But I appreciate that for some people the summer just wouldn’t be the summer without Big Brother and its house full of societies rejects/freaks and plain old weirdoes.

The Gods smiled down on me as I was travelling the first summer it was aired and as such never became one of the millions of captive audience. Captive is an apt word given the idea behind the show, and in theory I too find the concept interesting, however after 7 uneventful years (yes people shagging under a duvet is uneventful!!) surely today's producers need to take some drastic measure to transform this insanity from the mundane drivel it has become. And NO…the bloody tasks they are made complete are not in any way shape or form interesting.

So in an attempt to provide Channel 4's producers with some insight full suggestions An Smuigin has prepared some thoughts below and would also welcome some contributions…

Eviction -Quite simple approach, 2 nominees, one backgarden, one knife…fight to the death or at least until submission. Then we would see who really wants it most!

Tasks -
I really like the idea of challenging them with having to escape!!...Armed Guards with stun guns on duty..Anyone who successfully escapes gets a cash prize.

Diary Room -
Lie detectors mandatory, chair electrified. Then we will see who really likes who..false bastards!!

Sleeping Arrangements - What sleep..don't let them!!….no beds…lights always on…then watch the freaks come out to play…

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Also..when the winner begins his/her walk across the bridge at the end..a trap door should open..dropping him/her into a moate full of sharks...yes sharks with lasers!!!....ha ha ha ha ha

Anonymous said...

I just cant understand why people watch this rubbish..it is a complete waste of time..ultimatly highlighting that oh my god shock horror..people are generally fxxking BORING...

An Smuigin said...

Yes..my friends the day is upon us Big Brother 7 starts tonight..get ready for pull out supplements in the Sun. Wait of the usual fallout as all the contestants drop their veils of falsehoods and get locked on their first night..followed by 13 weeks of bitching..honesty I ask you is this entertainment???

Anonymous said...

Well it beats watching Man United.

Generic Viagra said...

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