Thursday, August 03, 2006

Celebrity Counties...can you do better!!

Looking through the last eight teams in the competition one night, we ‘accidentally’ turned on LOVE ISLAND. After four minutes we decided it was far far better Baywatch we promptly turned the sound off. Ten minutes later we began to ask…what celebrities truly represent this years quarter-finalists!!

Donegal: Samantha Mumba (Really popular for a while, keeps coming back when you think they have nothing left, all in all something a little different.)

Armagh: Angelina Jolie (Attitude, strength, the fear factor and amazing consistency. Capable of stunning glamour and kicking your ass. All Ireland Champions elect if you ask me)

Laois: Jennifer Anniston (Ah the nice team. This is the kind of team you would bring home to your parents. Many peoples favourites, look to have gotten over beatings by northern teams both on and off the field )

Dublin: Jodie Marsh (In your face, brash and a real crowd pleaser. Not sure about the accent but appeals to the common man. Knocking on the door of real fame for a while now.

Mayo: Scarlett Johanson (Potential to be a real star. Ability, talent and style all there in abundance. However, not yet the finished article each good performance matched with a horrendous day out. Not really in anyone’s top three but getting there.

Westmeath: Jade Goody (One summer of fame and celebrity, since then nothing to get excited about.)

Kerry: Victoria Beckham (Glamorous, stylish and a champion among rivals. Used to constant media scrutiny and rumour. Very hard to listen to)

Cork: Jennifer Lopez (This woman thinks she is god’s gift to acting, singing, dancing and just about everything else which must mean there’s some cork blood in there somewhere. In addition both constantly remind us where they come from. In terms of chances of winning the all-Ireland well " used to have a little now they have a lot")



Rambo must die said...

Looks like the Special One is special only in name...Armagh Champions elect! ha ha dont make me laugh. Kerry abu

An Smuigin said...

Derry: Jessica Simpson (Sometimes beautiful to look at, good movements but will use boots to walk all over you if things turn nasty)

Down: Kelly Osbourne (Overshadowed by achievements of their fathers, ugly to look at, allusions of grandeur).

Fermanagh: Linsey Lohan (Burst onto the scene a few years ago, made some really bad choices since then, can’t see them sticking the pace at the top)

Cavan: Britney Spears (No direction, no purpose, glories of the past a distant memory. Future not looking good)

Tyrone: Pink (Talented, driven, takes no bull from anyone. Never shirks from a fight and occasionally looks magnificent. A great competitor.)

Monaghan: Pamela Anderson (Big Guns in the forward line relied upon to make up for other failings. Requires huge support to keep their good “form” up.

Louth: Kylie (Small, plucky, really moves well. Punching above their weight and a joy to watch.)

Longford: Cherel Tweedy (Making inroads into the celebrity world with some good performances. One suspects, however, no matter how far they go they’ll never diverge too far from their, how shall I put this, upbringing. You can take the girl outta Longford but you can’t take the Longford outta the girl.)

Wexford: Colleen Mc Loughlin (Both follow their star player around and he is the reason that we even know the rest of their names. Plus their star player stamps as well.

Meath: Madonna (Old, tired, past it. Still around way after they were cool. Dealing out the same stuff they were in the glory days of the eighties and nineties. The Media still believe they have something to offer.)

Galway: Penelope Cruz (Ah the tribesmen, wild, unpredictable and not a little exotic. At times sublime (Vanilla Sky) at times ridiculous (Captain Coreillis Mandolin.)

Roscommon: Paris Hilton (One of them was caught on camera frolicking in a state of undress in a hotel, the other is American. Both are disliked by almost everyone.)

Sligo: Jade Goody (One summer of fame and celebrity, since then nothing to get excited about.)

Leitrim: Keira Knightley (Plucky competitor who tries hard and has a place in most neutrals heart. However, too thin on the ground to make a real impact)